New Life Story Seeds # 7

Liberation of the Captive Imagination: Charlotte Perkins Gilman

Dear Friends,

This issue of New Life Story Seeds focuses on the author of the classic
novel about the needs of creative spirits, "The Yellow Wallpaper."
Ultimately, Charlotte Perkins Gilman rose above crippling obstacles to
create both personal happiness and a productive career as a writer,
philosopher, and human rights activist. You'll find a quotation from her
diary of 1900 and some juicy questions for writing and thinking. The new
Hearth and Soul column continues, along with resources and gift book ideas.

My apologies for a late newsletter. A bad case of the winter flu laid me
low for several days, but I'm on the mend now.

The subscriber list of the newsletter continues to grow, and one of the most
rewarding aspects of this work is the fascinating correspondence with
readers all over the globe. I'm thrilled that so many of you write to tell
me that you find the newsletter stimulating, that you're thinking, rushing
out to buy the books mentioned in the newsletter, and printing out the
newsletter to keep the questions for later.

Wishing you a wonderful new year full of peace, happiness, prosperity,
fulfillment, and new life stories,

Ellen Moore

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In This Issue:
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A Thoughtful Quotation
Juicy Questions
Liberation of the Captive Imagination
Hearth and Soul
Resources and Gift Ideas

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A Thoughtful Quotation
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"I am here to serve the world. As a perceiver and transmitter of truth and
love--an interpreter, a reconciler. This is as true now--in happiness, as
it was in pain. Through my happiness I can serve better ... I can not give
him [Houghton] all I would like to--but he loves me. To make him happy
means a quiet beautiful, comfortable home, pleasant society and good living:
for me to be there mostly, and to be well and happy. I must be well and
happy--it is a clear duty. And I ought to be. Such clear wide lovely work!
Such endless work! Such good work. Now to write, this summer, beautiful
things. Not for money. The money will come or not, as always. But because
these things need to be told."

Charlotte Perkins Gilman
Diary, 1900

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Juicy Questions
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What is your purpose in life?

How do you discern that purpose?

What is your Work?

What is the relationship of your Work to your purpose in life?

To what extent do you see yourself as a perceiver and transmitter of truth
and love?

In what ways do you or do you not carry out that function?

What is the role of personal happiness in your life?

What makes you happy?

How important is a quiet, beautiful, comfortable home to you?

To what extent is creating a comfortable home part of your Work?

How do you define "good living?"

To what extent are you able to live "the good life?"

What is your duty with regard to happiness?

To what extent do you work for money and for the love of the work?

What things in your life must be told?

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Liberation of the Captive Imagination
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In an era when home and family were seen as a female's only proper areas of
influence, literary women of the 19th century often believed they had to
choose between writing careers and families. If they broke with tradition
and chose both paths, they were often deeply conflicted about their need to
write, and had difficulty balancing their writing careers with family
responsibilities. Without labor-saving appliances, wives and mothers of the
19th century and earlier who managed to turn out large amounts of longhand
material must have managed heroic and exhausting workloads.

It could be said that Charlotte Perkins Gilman came naturally to social
philosophy and reform. She was the great-niece of writer and abolitionist
campaigner Harriet Beecher Stowe (author of "Uncle Tom's Cabin). She was
also the great-niece of Congregational clergyman Henry Ward Beecher, and was
the niece of the famous Unitarian minister, Edward Everett Hale. From early
on, she felt a need to leave the world a better place for having been in it.
In her autobiography, she explained: "From sixteen I had not wavered from
that desire to help humanity which underlay all my studies. Here was the
world, visibly unhappy and as visibly unnecessarily so; surely it called for
the best efforts of all who could in the least understand what was the
matter, and had any rational improvements to propose."

Perhaps the most serious obstacle for Charlotte to surmount was the ongoing
effect of her chaotic early life. When she was a child, the family moved
frequently, her education was scanty, her father deserted the family when
she was nine, and her mother consistently withheld love from her. In her
scanty and intermittent diaries, much was written "between the lines."
Brief though they are, the diaries document the roller coaster life of a
strong, brave, intelligent woman beset by inner demons that made dealing
with outer problems even more difficult. Her general lack of coping ability
and emotional turmoil likely had its roots in the lack of love and parenting
she carried from childhood.

After having been devastated by a failed relationship with a woman,
Charlotte reluctantly agreed to marry Walter Stetson in 1884. Walter was an
artist who was jealous of Charlotte's writing and drawing talent. Charlotte
had long since resolved never to marry, and she had strong premonitions that
the marriage would be a mistake. Because Walter believed women should fill
only the traditional roles, forsaking all artistic or career pursuits, their
relationship turned stormy immediately after a brief, but rapturous
honeymoon.

When their daughter, Katharine, was born in 1885, Charlotte found childcare
difficult and demanding. With the duties of motherhood added to the already
burdensome housework, she was unable to find time or energy to write or
express herself artistically. Her life became impossible, and she was soon
overwhelmed with exhaustion, depression, hysteria, and desperation. In
October of 1885, she went alone to California to visit her brother. As soon
as she arrived there, she began to feel better, but returned to her former
state when she arrived home in the spring. In 1887, at the age of 26, she
went to a sanitarium for a "rest cure" to treat what was variously called a
breakdown, nervous prostration, and neurasthenia.

After a month of enforced rest, Charlotte felt well enough to return home.
The doctor's parting instructions, however, were a certain prescription for
disaster for a writer: "Live as domestic a life as possible. Have your
child with you all the time ... Lie down an hour after each meal. Have but
two hours' intellectual life a day. And never touch pen, brush, or pencil
as long as you live."

Predictably, she relapsed shortly after her return home. There was talk of
suicide, and finally, both Charlotte and Walter realized they must part.
They did so amicably. Charlotte wrote that it would be "better for that
dear child to have separated parents than a lunatic mother." She and
Katharine went to live in California. On her arrival, she wrote to Walter,
"I begin to feel alive and self-respecting. Oh the difference! You are
very dear to me and my love; but there is no disguising the fact that my
health and work lie not with you but away from you." There were attempts at
reconciliation, but by January of 1890, their relationship ended, and she
gave over Katharine's care to Walter. It was a difficult decision. She
loved her daughter dearly, but at that point in her life, she considered
herself a broken woman who had nothing to offer either her husband or
daughter.

Although there are large gaps in the diary of 1890, the beginnings of a new
life story emerge. Charlotte liberated her imagination and began the
recovery process. The entries in the earlier part of the year are
characterized by intellectual paralysis, despair, and despondency, but by
the end of the year, a remarkable transformation had taken place as she
determined to create a new life for herself. Emotional and intellectual
stability resulted in a growing self-confidence and independence, and she
gained both physical and mental endurance during that year. In June, she
began to lecture. By August, she had written "The Yellow Wallpaper," a
fictionalized account of her breakdown, and by December she had produced 33
articles and over 22 poems. It is no wonder she wrote of 1890 as a year of
"great growth and gain."

Although there were subsequent relapses, difficult and turbulent love
affairs with women, and a myriad of other difficulties, she began to produce
a torrent of writings. Despite poverty, rootlessness, and occasional
periods of poor emotional and physical health, she lectured tirelessly
throughout the country to promote her political, philosophical, and economic
viewpoints. The primary subject of her writing and lecturing was women's
suffrage and the need for women's economic independence. She also supported
the highly controversial (and often illegal) birth-control movement and the
radical notion that men and women should share equally in the work of
maintaining a home.

In 1900, when she married her first cousin, Houghton Gilman, she came into a
period of more-or-less permanent stability and happiness. She maintained
friendship with Walter and his new wife, and developed a close relationship
with Katharine. Unlike Walter, Houghton was supportive of all her literary,
philosophical, and political efforts.

She joined forces with others social reformers of the day: socialist Helen
Campbell, and women's suffrage advocates, Susan B. Anthony, Elizabeth Cady
Stanton, and Carrie Chapman Catt. Her "Women and Economics," was widely
praised and circulated, translated into several languages, and was even used
as a Vassar textbook for some time. For seven years, she self-published a
magazine called "The Forerunner." With Jane Addams of Hull House, she
founded the Women's Peace Party in 1915.

Charlotte and Houghton lived happily together until his sudden death in
1934. Long an advocate of the right to die, Charlotte took an overdose of
chloroform in 1935 at the age of 74, rather than die a slow and painful
death of incurable cancer. By the end of her life, she had produced
thousands of works, from poetry to short journalistic pieces, to fiction, to
book-length treatises on the role of women.

Women's writing of the 19th century may sound didactic to the modern ear,
with its tone of moral earnestness and its exhortations to right action. At
that time, women were taught that if they chose a career other than wife and
mother, their unique role in life should be to reform, preach, teach, and
serve as a source of betterment for the world. Likewise, Charlotte's poetry
now sounds dated and stilted. Much of her oeuvre has recently been
"rediscovered" and republished, however, because it is so relevant to today'
s political and economic climate. More than a half-century after her death,
Charlotte's words continue to impact our modern life. In a 1993 survey, she
was ranked sixth among the ten most influential American women of the 20th
century. In 1994, her life and work were accepted for the National Women's
Hall of Fame in Seneca Falls, New York.

Her most widely-read work is the harrowing novel, "The Yellow Wallpaper," an
autobiographical account of the most difficult period of her life. It
remains a classic in its ability to articulate the deepest needs of talented
and driven writers, and the tragedies that befall them when those needs are
thwarted.

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Hearth and Soul
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Friday, December 31, 1999: The paperwhites are fading, but their perfume
continues to fill the house, along with the aroma of an onion soup laced
with sage and garlic. Funny how important smells are, and how they can
change a mood or bring back the past in an instant. Just today, there was
an advertisement for a fragrance spray called "Clean Wet Laundry." I
considered buying some, then thought I'd just throw that load of towels in
the washer instead.

The seed catalogs haven't arrived yet, but I have wildly unrealistic dreams
for spring, and a few packet of seeds ready to plant for indoor greens
through the winter--collards, turnip greens, leaf lettuce. There's a
healthy crop of broccoli seeds sprouting in a mason jar on the windowsill,
and there are a few tiny paper pots I've made from recycled rough drafts
with that simple wooden potmaker from Burpee.

This time of year has always been meaningful for me, a time of reflection, a
time of looking both backward and forward, a time of introspection, and
gaining clarity in my life's purpose and intentions. It was fascinating to
research the life and times of Charlotte Perkins Gilman, and to contemplate
her thoughts and actions of a hundred years ago. Her diaries were often
maddeningly terse and cryptic, and her life was ever-so-much more
complicated than can be conveyed in a few paragraphs. Dizzying changes at
every turn, then eventual contentment and happiness.

My thoughts wandered back a hundred years to Emilio's and my forebears.
Mine were pioneers, teachers, and farmers living off the rich land of the
North American Midwest. Emilio's ancestry is quite different from mine-his
grandparents and great-grandparents all hailed from Eastern Europe, where
they lived in terror of pogroms.

For dinner, I'll cook an updated version of kasha varnishkes (onions,
buckwheat groats, pasta) in honor of Emilio's Jewish tradition.
To drink, there will be warm floating island (a custard mixture)
from my great-grandmother's recipe served in antique china cups, a family
tradition. It was a popular drink at the turn of the century and looks
quaint in a large punch bowl, but we'll probably omit the islands.

After dinner, I'll light the banks of candles around the house. White
votives in a variety of thrift-store containers--drinking glasses, goblets,
compote dishes, wine glasses, brandy snifters. Dozens of them massed on
tables, book shelves, windowsills. It's a lovely, heartening glow. Warmth,
contentment, peace. Then we'll write in our journals, talk, and listen to a
Bach cantata.

We may or may not be awake for the midnight turn of the century, and it
wouldn't be unusual if I were asleep by 9:00. The tradition is that I read
the journal of the past year and write about the current and coming years in
an attempt to gain clarity about meaning and purpose and progress. There is
a sense of sense of suspense as I ask for guidance for the coming year.

Certain themes, such as home, comfort, and grace-fullness predominate this
year: What needs to fall away in order to create a simpler life with less
stress and more soul? What needs to be added? How to renovate this house
and reclaim energy in order to live a useful life that works? How to
continue to make a home that nurtures our spirits and souls as well as our
bodies? How to live close to nature, her seasons and universal laws? How
to live a full, grateful life? How to see beneath the surface of challenges
and difficulties to the buried gifts they bring? And most of all, as Rilke
suggested, loving and accepting the questions themselves as we are living
them.

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Resources/Gift Ideas
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Hot off the Press! Kay Adams has just released her latest book. "The Write
Way to Wellness: A Workbook for Healing and Change" is now available, along
with an audiotape of Kay's entrance meditations. It's a user-friendly guide
to accessing the benefits of cathartic and reflective writing in your own
life. Step-by-step processes and exercises lead you through your own
healing journey. Dr. James Pennebaker, leading research scientist in the
field of writing and health, says Kay's book "melds clinical wisdom and
cutting edge research ... smart and beautifully organized." Check out Kay'
s other books too, and order direct from The Center for Journal Therapy by
calling 1-888-421-2298 or click on the book title above.

Books by and about Charlotte Perkins Gilman:

Lane, Ann J.. To Herland and Beyond: The Life and Work of Charlotte Perkins
Gilman. Univ Pr of Virginia, 1997.

Perkins Gilman, Charlotte. The Abridged Diaries of Charlotte Perkins Gilman
[ABRIDGED]. Univ Pr of Virginia, 1998.

Perkins Gilman, Charlotte. The Charlotte Perkins Gilman Reader. Univ Pr of
Virginia, 1999.

Perkins Gilman, Charlotte. The Living of Charlotte Perkins Gilman: An
Autobiography (Wisconsin Studies in American Autobiography). Univ of
Wisconsin Pr, 1991.

Perkins Gilman, Charlotte. The Yellow Wall-Paper and Other Stories (Oxford
World's Classics). Oxford Univ Pr (Trade), 1998.

Visit Jennifer Louden's deep-comfort website. She's the author of "The
Women's Comfort Book," "The Couple's Comfort Book," and "The Women's Retreat
Book" (in which journaling figures prominently). Check out her links and
subscribe to her free newsletter.
http://www.comfortqueen.com/.

One of the biggest and best inspirational sites on the web is The
Motivational Mecca run by Josh Hinds, a nice young fellow who counts his dad
as his number-one mentor. You'll find loads of inspirational and
motivational links and information. Subscribe to the free daily newsletter:
Inspiration a Day.
<http://joshhinds.com/excite.html>

Visit The National Women's Hall of Fame for resources, links, bookstore,
exercises, and games to increase understanding of the contribution of women
to America.
<http://www.greatwomen.org/index.html> THIS LINK NO LONGER WORKS

"They Used to Call Me Snow White...But I Drifted", Regina Barreca's scholarly, 
yet bawdy analysis of the uses and power of women's humor is a fabulous 
blend of psychology, sociology, and academic theory. 
A great read. She's written other books you might want to
investigate in Amazon.

Of Cynthia Heimel's "Sex Tips for Girls,"
an Amazon reader wrote: "No lie, this book changed my life. It's all about
self-respect and fun. See for yourself." It's racy, empowering,
optimistic, and laugh-out-loud funny. Some of her other sassy and
insightful books include: "When Your Phone Doesn't Ring, It'll Be Me," and
"If you Can't Live Without Me, Why Aren't You Dead Yet?"

"Writing a Woman's Life"
According to Carolyn Heilbrun, a woman's life can be written in four ways.
In addition to autobiography, biography, and fiction, a woman may
unconsciously write a life for herself before she actually lives it. I just
picked this book up again this week, and had forgotten how rich and
wonderful it is. Time to read it again! It's a slim volume, but the kind
that needs to be put down from time to time in order to digest the keen
insights about the ways culture affects women's (and therefore men's) lives.
She examines the lives and writings of such women as Virginia Woolf,
Colette, George Eliot, Jane Austen, George Sand, Charlotte Bronte, Dorothy
Sayers, Willa Cather, Adrienne Rich, and others. Heilbrun herself is a good
example of the fourth kind of writing about women's lives: In addition to
her scholarly books, she is the author of a series of Kate Fansler detective
novels under the pen name of Amanda Cross.

Susan Hertog's new biography of Anne Morrow Lindbergh has finally been
released. If you're a fan, you'll surely want this one for your collection.

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© Copyright Ellen Moore, Ph.D. 2000

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